And we’re back.  I was originally planning to chuck this week’s new entries in with the post for tomorrow’s chart, but it seems that in my absence the country has had one of its periodic fits of lunacy that means there will be plenty to say in that column already.  So instead, I’m going to briefly run through last week’s largely uneventful chart to get us up to date…

35.  Jakwob (featuring Maiday) – “Fade”

The first hit for James Jacob, a producer from Hereford who some of the evening shows on Radio 1 have been vaguely supporting for a couple of years now.  It’s a pretty little thing, but it’s going no further.  I’ve never heard of singer Maiday, but she’s got a couple of videos of her own on YouTube, neither of which seems to have made a huge impact, but then they don’t actually seem to have been followed up by a commercial release – here’s “Breathe”.

32.  ReConnected – “One in a Million”

Oh good god.  ReConnected are an attempt to launch a new boy band, based around three of the members from Connected.  Remember Connected?  No, of course you don’t.  They came eighth in Britain’s Got Talent.  Three years ago.  They’re now signed to a label implausibly funded by Duncan Bannatyne from Dragon’s Den, and I suppose at least they’ve done better than Hamfatter, who got investment on the show from Peter Jones and sank without trace.  The record is entirely mediocre, and it’s going no further.

27.  Pitbull (featuring Christina Aguilera) – “Feel This Moment”

Could be worse, I suppose.  It’s got a decent vocal from Christina Aguilera, it’s got a relatively anonymous contribution from Pitbull… oh, and it’s got a cheap synth bashing out pop classic “Take on Me” by A-Ha, the international number one from 1985, which is grating to say the least.  But it’s got a bit of energy, I guess.

It climbs 14 places in the midweeks, so evidently there’s a lot of people out there who don’t know “Take on Me” well enough to find the track it annoying.

16.  Kodaline – “High Hopes”

Kodaline are an Irish alt-rock band of the Very Sincere variety.  They had a number 1 in Ireland in 2007 under the name 21 Demands as an unsigned act, and then seem to have disappeared for years before changing their name and resurfacing in a bid for the Coldplay market.  Slightly unusual video, at least in terms of casting.  It’s their first UK hit and, judging from the midweeks, it’ll be gone next week.

1.  The Saturdays (featuring Sean Paul) – “What About Us”)

After three weeks, “Mirrors” is replaced by the Saturdays.  This is (presumably) the second single from their next, as-yet-unannounced album, following “30 Days”, which made number 7 last year.

The Saturdays have been going since 2008, which is an eternity in girl band terms, and surprisingly this is their first number one.  Previously, their biggest hits were “Just Can’t Get Enough” and “Forever Is Over”, which both made number 2 in 2009.  Through a mixture of slightly underpowered material and questionable release scheduling, they looked to be on track to have a successful pop career without ever actually making it to the top.

The group have recently been doing a reality show about their attempt to break into the US market, which is a bit of a sign of desperation.  Still, this did make number 27 on the US dance chart to give them their first American hit of any sort.

The version above is the original – for some reason, it has apparently been determined that the record would benefit from having Sean Paul talking over it, hence his credit on the chart.  You can watch his version here, but I wouldn’t bother – he’s not adding anything.  It’s his second UK number one as a guest vocalist; he was also on “Breathe” by Blu Cantrell back in 2003.

Digression: just getting somebody to talk over your record for the single version can work.  I’ve always loved the single version of “I Want You” by the Inspiral Carpets, which features Mark E Smith talking nonsense over the top through the entire record.

But Sean Paul is not Mark E Smith.

On the album chart:

• “The 20/20 Experience” by Justin Timberlake at number 1, obviously.
  
• “Bloodsports” by Suede at 10 – their first new album since 2002.
• “Tooth & Nail” by Billy Bragg at 13.  Haven’t heard it, but can’t imagine he regards these as joyous times.
• “If You Leave” by Daughter at 16.  Indie-folk trio.
• “Specter at the Feast” by Black Rebel Motorcycle Club at 31.  I didn’t realise these guys were still going.
• “Monkey Minds in the Devil’s Time” by Steve Mason at 34.  He’s the lead guitarist for Jars of Clay, a Christian rock band.
• “Every Weekend” by Hadouken! at 35.  Remember new rave?  Well, their previous two albums made the top 20, so it seems a diminishing number of people do.
• “The Golden Age” by Woodkid at 38.  Woodkid is Yoann Lemoine, a French artist probably better known for his videos for the likes of Katy Perry.