There’s a ton of new entries on the album chart this week, so settle in.  And hey, here’s our first new number one of 2019!

1.  Ariana Grande – “7 Rings”

Mmm.  This is Ariana Grande’s fourth UK number one and… it’s a bit rubbish, this, isn’t it?  Hugely popular – nearly 17 million streams in a week, and you don’t get that just from dutiful fans listening.  But still a bit rubbish.  It’s the old “allow me to inform you of my significant wealth” song, which I’m never interested in, even if it is tongue in cheek (“Whoever said money can’t solve your problems / Must not have had enough money to solve ’em”).  It’s… vaguely unlikeable, you know, which is not usually an issue with Ariana Grande.

The tune is, of course, lifted from “My Favourite Things”, from The Sound of Music.

Now, “My Favourite Things” is a list song of simple, likeable things that are available to everyone, so applying it to a list of bling is hugely inappropriate, and of course That’s The Joke.  It’s not an original joke, mind you – here’s Big Brovaz, who had the same idea in 2003 and got to number 2 with it.  Honestly, I prefer their version.

Anyway.  “Dancing With A Stranger” by Sam Smith & Normani climbs 4-3.

5.  Calvin Harris & Rag’n’Bone Man – “Giant”

Climbing from last week’s number 7, but it’s got a video now, and a pretty one at that.

9.  Russ – “Gun Lean”

This entered at 36 three weeks ago but now rockets from the thirties direct to the top 10 on the back of a remix with a ton of guests attached (Lethal Bizzle being the best known).  Russ’s original is still listed as the lead version, so none of them actually get a chart credit.

11.  Mabel – “Don’t Call Me Up”

This is the bonus track on – really, it’s come to this – the deluxe version of her debut mixtape.  It’s an okayish break-up song but the video does it no favours by making it look sub-Dua Lipa.

“Options” by NSG featuring Tion Wayne climbs 14-12, and “Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi climbs 29-13.  Somewhat depressingly, “Undecided” by Chris Brown rebounds 21-16, because apparently there really is no such thing as bad publicity.  For reasons I’m not altogether clear on, “Close to Me” by Ellie Goulding & Diplo featuring Swae Lee, which peaked at 17 before Christmas and left the top 40 at new year, re-enters at 25.

27.  AJ Tracey – “Psych Out”

This is the third hit for AJ Tracey; “Butterflies” reached number 19 last June, and a track awkwardly titled “Lo(v/s)er” scraped to 38 later in the year.  In this video, he demonstrates that while other English rappers can hire a car for their video, he can also hire a country house and some strippers.

The only thing of note further down is “Saturday Nights” by Khalid, which climbs 38-34, so let’s move on to the album chart.  Can you guess?

Yes, the Greatest Showman soundtrack is still number 1 for a twenty-eighth week, equalling the run of “Sergeant Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band”.  The top four is static, with George Ezra at 2, the Bohemian Rhapsody movie soundtrack at 3, and the Star is Born soundtrack at 4 – do you see a pattern here?

5.  Dodie – “Human”

She’s a YouTube songwriter, though the video above is a lot better than that description might suggest. This is… well, officially it’s her third EP, but it qualifies for the album chart and gives her a second (and marginally higher) top ten album.

6.  James Blake – “Assume Form”

The winner of the 2013 Mercury Prize releases an album every three years or so.  Three of them have made the top ten, and this is the highest.  It’s been well reviewed, and also represents a tack towards something less minimal – note the Travis Scott guest appearance on the track above.

8.  Thunder – “Please Remain Seated”

That’s the same Thunder who were having mid-table singles chart hits in the early 90s.  They’re still going – they’ve had two other top ten albums since 2015 – but this is their acoustic retrospective album. The track above is a bold choice to pick for the single – it’s a cover of a 2008 single that didn’t make the top 100, from an album that got to number 62 – but it’s actually okay.

16.  Future – “Future Hndrxx Pts The Wizard”

Twenty tracks long, supported by a documentary film… blimey, this sounds self-indulgent.  Future churns out albums – this is his fifth release in under two years.  It falls just short of matching the number 15 peak of 2017’s self-titled “Future”.  Technically his biggest album was 2015’s “What A Time To Be Alive”, but that was a collaboration with Drake.

17.  The Twilight Sad – “It Won’t Be Like This All The Time”

They sound like a barrel of laughs, don’t they?  The Twilight Sad are a Scottish indie band who’ve been around for over a decade.  It’s their fifth album, but the first to chart.  Their sound has drifted a bit over the years – when they chose the name, they were making records like this – but they’re still decidedly emotional.  They’re good at it, mind you.

25.  Maggie Rogers – “Heard It In A Past Life”

She’s an American songwriter, and this is her major label debut, though she’s released two previous albums independently.  She got signed after unexpectedly having a minor American hit in 2016 with “Alaska”, thanks to a video of her at a masterclass with Pharrell Williams that went viral.

30.  Sharon Van Etten – “Remind Me Tomorrow”

Another American songwriter on her fifth proper album (though self-released material goes back to 2005).  The last one was in 2014, and reached 27.  The track above is a bit of a dirge, to be honest.

36.  Papa Roach – “Who Do You Trust”

Yes, they are still going, though the resurgence that saw them get an album to number 13 in 2015 has evidently petered out.

38.  Steve Mason – “About The Light”

Finally, the former lead singer of the Beta Band, now on his fourth album (and the third to chart).  This is worth a play.