(In case you’ve forgotten, or you just didn’t listen all the way to the end of last week’s podcast, House to Astonish episode 50 will be out next Sunday.  In the meantime, regulars features…)

As expected from the midweeks, the top two singles trade places this week, with Cheryl Cole dropping to 2, and “The Only Girl in the World” by Rihanna climbing to number 1.  With the charts having slipped back into the old ways of much-hyped singles entering at the top upon release – perhaps because that makes it possible to concentrate sales into a few days in a way that can’t be done when you’re promoting the third single from an album and it’s already available for download – it’s the first record to climb to the top since “Club Can’t Handle Me” by Flo Rida in August.  (Yes, Bruno Mars went back to number 1 a couple of weeks ago, but he also entered at number 1 in the first place.)

It’s more of a European electropop record than an R&B track, which is hardly surprising, since it’s a Stargate production.  And it’s a great single – stomping production, big chorus, and for once they’ve not gone overboard with the Autotune.  One of the best number one singles of the year, actually.

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Autumn – that very special time of the year when the leaves fall, the nights draw in, and anyone vaguely associated with The X Factor makes sure they have a new album out.  This week, it’s judge Cheryl Cole, and the first single from her second solo album is “Promise This”.

Cole started off in 2002 as a member of Girls Aloud, the girl group formed on reality TV show Popstars: The Rivals, and who turned out to surpass all predictions for their durability.  Wisely recognising that winning a talent show would only take them so far, their management more or less assigned them to become the front group for production studio Xenomania, leading to a string of generally well-received singles.  Theoretically they’ve never split up; they went on hiatus in 2009 for the members for pursue solo projects – or, in other words, for Cheryl Cole to make solo albums, Sarah Harding to have a go at acting, and the other three to kill time.  (Nadine Coyle’s first solo single will be on Sunday’s chart, and the midweeks have it at 26.)  There’s no obvious sign of the group reforming.

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I’m running behind on these again, so this is the chart from the week before last – plenty of new entries, few of them particularly noteworthy.

There’s a change at the top, but unusually, it’s the return of a previous number 1 – “Just The Way You Are (Amazing)” by Bruno Mars.

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This week’s number 1 is still Cee Lo Green, for the second week.  I covered that single in the previous post, if you haven’t read it yet.  It’s an odd race for the top, with the number 2 slot going to Bruno Mars’ “Just the Way You Are” – another former number one, and according to the midweeks, currently likely to return to the top on Sunday.

This is also the first chart to come with something of an asterisk attached.  We are now into the X Factor live finals, and this year, the performances are available for download on iTunes.  But the record company has opted to exclude from the chart.  (More accurately, you need to register a single with the Official Chart Company to opt in.  But same difference.)  From Simon Cowell’s point of view, there are good reasons for this.  If it becomes clear that somebody’s a runaway leader, there’s no tension going into the final.

But we know that songs can re-enter the charts on the strength of X Factor performances; and we know that even Sky One’s Must Be The Music was able to propel three singles into the top ten, with a much lower audience.  The chances are good, then, that if the X Factor downloads were eligible for the charts, several of them would have made it in – even with the first week giving audiences sixteen tracks to choose from.  (They’re doing double eliminations in the first few weeks to get the numbers down to a more sensible level.)

Would any of these tracks have made number 1?  My guess is, probably not.  X Factor winners inevitably get to number 1 (Joe McElderry made it on his second week of release), but their singles are part of a grand narrative.  These ones aren’t.  The audience is split between sixteen acts.  They’re released on Saturday nights, so the sales will be split between two chart weeks.  And as we’ll see shortly, there’s a limit to the promotional power of a single performance on the show.

Meanwhile, this week’s highest new entry…

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And I had such high hopes of staying up to date.  Ah well.  At least this number one managed two weeks at the top, so we’re kind-of-sort-of still current.  And it’s a slightly unexpected number one, because the same week saw the release of “Shame” by Robbie Williams and Gary Barlow.  That single was generally assumed to have a clear run at the top, if only for the gimmick factor of having them both appear on the same track.

But no.  The new number one is Cee Lo Green‘s viral YouTube hit, which the Official Chart Company is electing to call “Forget You.” That’s the name of the radio edit – and to be fair, judging from the iTunes chart, people are actually buying that version too, in pretty substantial numbers.  But, understandably enough, most people are going for the original.

The song does have a proper video now, but here’s the original animated-typography version.

Caution: there will be swearing once we get past the cut.

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Right – this time I really, really will bring things up to date!

This week’s number 1 is “Written in the Stars” by Tinie Tempah.  It’s on EMI, so the YouTube video isn’t embeddable, but hey, hop over there if you want to see the man himself standing on a rooftop in New York looking moody.  Or, if it works in your jurisdiction, here’s the Daily Motion version, which is also uploaded by EMI and is embeddable, because they can’t make up their bloody minds.

While we’ve had a huge turnover of number one singles this year, “Written in the Stars” is one of the top sellers, shifting 115K in its first week.

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And I was so close to catching up.  Oh well, we’ll get there eventually.

After two weeks at number 1, Alexandra Burke surprisingly dropped all the way to number 5 (though supposedly it was a very close run thing between numbers 3, 4 and 5, so she was a bit unlucky there).  The new number 1 – another one-week occupant – was “Just The Way You Are” by Bruno Mars.

In this video, you can see him flirting with a coy actress, while the video director livens things up with animated tape from a cassette.  Yes, a cassette.  Probably a bit hard to animate a wax cylinder.

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After a long run of singles that only spent a week at number 1, at last we reach a record that managed two.  (It’s unlikely to manage three, since the midweek charts show it dropping to 6.)  And yes, you guessed it, it’s connected to The X Factor.

“Start Without You” by Alexandra Burke featuring Laza Morgan.  Simon Cowell’s empire notches up its second consecutive number one – last time it was the 2009 runner-up, this time it’s the 2008 winner with the lead single from her next album.

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Continuing my slow catch-up on the singles chart…

It’s September. It’s the start of the winter TV season. And you know what that means. Yes, The X Factor is back.  Brace yourselves for the usual bombardment of tie-in singles, charity releases, records by acts vaguely associated with previous years, and songs plucked from back catalogue obscurity by a high-profile amateur cover version.

Take this week’s number one, which is “Please Don’t Let Me Go” by Olly Murs.  (It’s not embeddable, so you’ll just have to watch it on YouTube, if you want to hear it.)

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