Another pay per view this weekend, and there’s a bit of filler going on here. \u00a0Injuries and suspensions have led to a bit of reshuffling of this card, and there’s also a main event match that looks sure to under deliver.<\/p>\n
No Way Out<\/em>\u00a0is a name that hasn’t been used since 2009, but it’s basically just one of the generic B-list pay per views that has no particular gimmick. \u00a0There was some talk at one point that this was going to be a cage match show, which would have fitted with the name. \u00a0But it turns out there’s just one cage match. \u00a0In practice, it’s simply a generic PPV. \u00a0(In Germany, by the way, it’s called No Escape<\/em>. \u00a0That’s because they already used the name No Way Out<\/em>\u00a0in February when the Germans flatly refused to promote a show called Elimination Chamber<\/em>.)<\/p>\n So… the card.<\/p>\n 1. \u00a0Steel Cage Match: John Cena v. The Big Show.<\/strong>\u00a0 This is the latest step in the ongoing John Laurinaitis storyline, which is now being overwritten to the point of horror.<\/p>\n John Laurinaitis, you will recall, became general manager of both Raw and Smackdown (the difference between the two shows having been largely eroded to the point of meaningless) at Wrestlemania. \u00a0He’s now the erratic heel manager on both shows. \u00a0The anonymous board of directors are notionally meant to be faces, but this being wrestling, they seem incapable of simply firing the guy when they could make a needlessly complex match with his job at stake. \u00a0So last month we had John Cena v John Laurinaitis with Cena having to do nothing more than pin a retired wrestler to end the storyline. \u00a0But he dragged it out for ages until the Big Show showed up to help Laurinaitis win. \u00a0(This was such obviously stupid behaviour that they felt obliged to try – and fail – to explain it on Raw. \u00a0If the WWE’s current obsession with Twitter has any upside, it’s that they’re continually being reminded of the gaping plot holes.)<\/p>\n Vince McMahon showed up again last week back in his old figurehead role (with no explanation, despite his being removed from power ages ago), and so the stipulation for this match is: if Cena wins, McMahon will apparently fire Laurinaitis. \u00a0If Big Show wins, Laurinaitis keeps his job and will fire Cena.<\/p>\n Except McMahon was knocked out Big Show at the end of Raw, so he may or may not be there on Monday to actually fire<\/em>\u00a0Laurinaitis.<\/p>\n Truly this is a show which would be improved by the writing skills of Jeph Loeb.<\/p>\n There are all manner of problems with the stipulations attached to this match. \u00a0Fundamentally, I don’t think most people believe either<\/em>\u00a0stipulation is going to be honoured. \u00a0They “fired” Cena last year and he didn’t miss a single show. \u00a0Laurinaitis could<\/em>\u00a0conceivably go, but it’s unlikely they would resolve that storyline on a B-show. \u00a0These sort of stipulations only work if the audience accepts that something’s actually at stake. \u00a0Otherwise, you’re just reminding the audience that nothing is.<\/p>\n The match will be competent enough but we’ve seen it before and I expect it to be basically a backdrop for a fundamentally flawed story. \u00a0It’s not something that really interests me. \u00a0My guess would be that Cena wins but some sort of screwjob involving Vince’s absence leads to Laurinaitis staying in place anyway – to general irritation.<\/p>\n 2. \u00a0World Heavyweight Title: Sheamus v Dolph Ziggler.<\/strong>\u00a0 The original idea here was for Sheamus to defend against Alberto Del Rio, but he’s out with a concussion. \u00a0So Ziggler was parachuted into the slot on Monday. \u00a0He was meant to be wrestling Randy Orton on the undercard, but Orton’s just been suspended for a drug test failure. \u00a0So that worked out well. \u00a0Kind of.<\/p>\n Ziggler is widely regarded as one of the most underrated wrestlers in the company, and someone who ought to be promoted to the main event. \u00a0He and Sheamus are likely to have a good match. \u00a0But it’s one we’ve seen before, on free TV, quite recently. \u00a0And Ziggler’s been booked as a mid card guy for a while. \u00a0So it’s rather difficult to position him as a serious threat to the title, unfortunately, and it’s not what you’d call an obvious pay-per-view draw. \u00a0Still, it’s an opportunity for Ziggler to have a high quality main-event match, and that’s something. \u00a0With the company’s depth problems, they really ought to be doing more with him. \u00a0After all, as this match shows, they need<\/em>\u00a0him in this role.<\/p>\n A win for Ziggler would be a major shock, but there are arguments for doing it – essentially, that it would give him his much-needed promotion and that it would get a bit of attention. \u00a0I’d still put my money on Sheamus.<\/p>\n 3. \u00a0WWE Title: CM Punk v Daniel Bryan v Kane.<\/strong>\u00a0 Another match that would probably have benefitted from dialling back the storyline a bit, though at least this one still makes some degree of sense. \u00a0Punk remains the defending champion – and he’s now had the belt since 20 November 2011, an extremely long run by current standards. \u00a0(In fact, if he survives this match, he’ll surpass Triple H’s 210-day reign from 2008. \u00a0After that, his next target is John Cena’s 2006-7 reign which lasted over a year.)<\/p>\n Punk and Bryan had a well received match on the last show, but for some reason the company has decided that the rematch would be improved by throwing veteran brawler Kane into the mix. \u00a0Personally, I’d rather have just seen them continue the two-man programme. \u00a0Even so, it’s not a catastrophic decision; the match is still a reasonably decent one.<\/p>\n In the background of this storyline is AJ Lee, who was Bryan’s girl-next-door girlfriend for some months until he turned heel and eventually dumped her after blaming her for his 18-second loss at Wrestlemania. \u00a0In a rare example of character development that makes passable sense, even if it’s a bit of a cliche, AJ has migrated over a period of months from “girl next door” to “loyal girlfriend” to “long-suffering girlfriend” to “jilted and desperate to get her man back” to “quite possibly stark raving mad.” \u00a0She now hovers on the fringes of this storyline apparently aligning herself with CM Punk – she wears a version of his outfit – but also acting rather erratically and being regarded by all three wrestlers as essentially a loose cannon who might do anything. \u00a0The story, in part, is about whether she’s faking it, and (in any event) who she will actually side with, and (assuming anyone’s actually thought about it) why.<\/p>\n AJ has unexpectedly turned out to be rather good in this role, and so it’s working better than you would expect, even though it’s a case of loading up a match with story content it doesn’t necessarily need. \u00a0If it’s well handled, this could still be good. \u00a0As for who wins… Punk has<\/em>\u00a0held that title for an awfully long time, and Daniel Bryan’s had a recent surge of popularity, and it’s easier for AJ to play a part in the finish if he wins. \u00a0On the other hand, they only just took the Smackdown title off<\/em>\u00a0Bryan, so it’d be a slightly odd move. \u00a0I could easily see Punk retaining the title and everything being dragged out a little longer, to be paid off at a higher-profile show. \u00a0As for Kane, he’s there as a complicating factor; he wasn’t a big success the last time they gave him the title, and I’d be very surprised if they went back there.<\/p>\n 4. \u00a0WWE Intercontinental Title: Christian v Cody Rhodes.<\/strong>\u00a0 Christian returned unexpectedly at the last PPV and beat Rhodes for the title. \u00a0This is the obligatory rematch. \u00a0The problem with Christian’s return is that they’ve decided to make him a babyface even though he was last seen as a heel, and nothing has really been done to explain the turn. \u00a0I assume they were betting on the common babyface reaction that popular wrestlers get after being away for a while, but even so, you’ve got to do something<\/em>\u00a0to motivate the character.<\/p>\n Still, it’s a very good match on paper. \u00a0Christian ought to win; he needs to hold on to the title to rebuild momentum, and Rhodes would be treading water if he won the title back yet again.<\/p>\n 5. \u00a0WWE Divas Title: Layla El v Beth Phoenix.<\/strong>\u00a0 The WWE hasn’t done a great deal with Layla after bringing her back and giving her the title (which they did mainly because they thought it would be a surprise). \u00a0She’s been dutifully defending the thing at those shows, but there’s not been much in the way of storyline for her. \u00a0This could really go either way – they might just be treading water, in which case Layla ought to retain on the logic that title changes ought to mean something, or they might be cycling the title back round to Beth Phoenix in order to start a storyline with her. \u00a0By the generally uninspiring standards of the WWE women’s division, which has never had its recruiting priorities straight, this should be relatively good.<\/p>\n 6. \u00a0Tuxedo match: Santino Marella v Ricardo Rodriguez.<\/strong>\u00a0 Ricardo Rodriguez is the long-suffering “personal ring announcer” of Alberto Del Rio, and with his boss out with a concussion, they’ve got to find something for him to do. \u00a0This is apparently their solution – program him against fellow comedy wrestler Santino Marella. \u00a0At least it gets him on the show.<\/p>\n A tuxedo match is an old comedy gimmick traditionally used for fights between managers. \u00a0The aim is to tear off the opponent’s tuxedo. \u00a0No, really.<\/p>\n WWE comedy tends to be somewhere between tedious and excruciating, but with the right material these guys can<\/em>\u00a0be funny, so you never know. \u00a0And while you wouldn’t know it to look at him (and the WWE generally goes out of its way to portray him as a hapless non-combatant), Rodriguez is<\/em>\u00a0actually a proper wrestler – he spent years on the California indie circuit. \u00a0So if they want him to do a real match, he can actually do it.<\/p>\n On paper, Santino ought to win, since he’s the US champion and he’s fighting a ring announcer. \u00a0It’s way too early to do any sort of storyline to split Ricardo off from Alberto Del Rio, though it’s got to come at some point; you have to question whether Del Rio, as a main event heel, really benefits from a comedy sidekick.<\/p>\n 7. \u00a0Brodus Clay v David Otunga.<\/strong>\u00a0 This is the pre-show match which will be streaming on YouTube. \u00a0Clay used to be a generic thug but has recently been repackaged in the 2012 version of the “dancing fat man who’s fun-loving yet physically dominant” gimmick. \u00a0While it’s plainly a novelty gimmick, it’s not the worst role to have. \u00a0After all, he gets two dancers to accompany him to the ring, which makes him look like a big deal. \u00a0And something broadly similar worked wonders for Rikishi’s career back in the day.<\/p>\n David Otunga is John Laurinaitis’ sidekick, with a weird “wrestling lawyer” gimmick that is only slightly less weird for being legitimate. \u00a0(All the stuff about him being a Harvard-qualified lawyer is, quite bizarrely, true.) \u00a0There is in theory a storyline here – Otunga injured Clay’s knee on this week’s television – but let’s be realistic. \u00a0Clay never loses. \u00a0Otunga never wins. \u00a0It’s a bit of a foregone conclusion. \u00a0And while there’s a case to be made for giving Otunga a bit more credibility so that he can function a little more effectively as Laurinaitis’ henchman, there’s no way that Clay’s months-long winning streak is ending against David Otunga on YouTube.<\/p>\n Also on this show…<\/strong>\u00a0Triple H will be appearing to talk about the Brock Lesnar storyline that’s been parked for weeks. \u00a0This is apparently scheduled as the first step of the build towards Triple H v Lesnar at Summerslam in two shows time. \u00a0Are you interested in buying a PPV to see an interview? \u00a0No, me neither. \u00a0There’s some interest here in terms of where they’re actually going with Lesnar, whose relationship with the company seems to run hot and cold, but you don’t need to buy the show just for that. \u00a0I’d stick this on Raw on Monday rather than waste PPV time on it.<\/p>\n Worth getting?<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, there are a couple of good matches on paper, but I don’t see it as a very inspiring card. \u00a0You can see plenty of matches of this standard on regular TV.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Another pay per view this weekend, and there’s a bit of filler going on here. \u00a0Injuries and suspensions have led to a bit of reshuffling of this card, and there’s also a main event match that looks sure to under deliver. 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