It’s late in the week, but still time enough to get this done!

1.  Sam & The Womp – “Bom Bom”

Ooh, a summer novelty record!  More to the point, a record that’s apparently being used in an advert for Southern Comfort.

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One of the weirdest charts in quite some time, and it’s all the fault of the Olympic closing ceremony.  While the opening ceremony was generally acclaimed as a weird but wonderful tribute to all things British, the closing ceremony – which I watched from a hotel room in Switzerland until I lost the will to live – was essentially a middle aged man sharing his record collection with us.  But if you play music to a large enough audience, some of them will go out and buy it, even if it’s music they’ve heard a million times before.  People are strange that way.

1.  Rita Ora – “How We Do (Party)”

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Bringing us up to date before the middle aged retro-fest on Sunday…

1.  Wiley (featuring Ms D) – “Heatwave”

Second week at the top.  This is in the post immediately below.  Go see it there.  The midweeks and the iTunes chart both indicate that two weeks will be as far as it goes.

We may now begin this week’s theme: new entries having their one week of glory that look set to plunge in the midweeks.

3.  Lawson – “Taking Over Me”

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Well, hello there!

It’s going to take me a little while to get back up to speed with the comics – I’m now about three weeks behind, at least on the books I buy physically.  But in the meantime, let’s get gently back into the swing of things by catching up with the charts.  NB: The really interesting chart is arguably the one after this, which has the effects of the Olympic opening ceremony, but, oh well.  (This Sunday’s chart, which has the knock on effects of the closing ceremony, looks set to be a veritable back catalogue orgy.)

Frankly, there are quite a few records on the next few charts that I haven’t heard yet.  Let’s see if any pleasant surprises await!

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Don’t forget there’s a new podcast up, and it’s just one post down!

Meanwhile, let’s catch up on last week’s chart.  In fact, it’s another relatively quiet week, so this probably won’t take us all that long.

1.  Florence + The Machine – “Spectrum”

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Don’t get too comfortable, this won’t take long.  The week ending 8 July 2012 was utterly dead for new releases, resulting in a chart with only two new entries, both miles down the chart, and with only one major climber (“Pound the Alarm” by Nicki Minaj, jumping 34-16).

1.  Maroon 5 (feat Wiz Khalifa) – “Payphone”

Haven’t we been here before?  “Payphone” was number 1 two weeks ago, it got knocked off by will.i.am’s “This Is Love” (which drops to 3 this week), and now it’s back.  It’s probably not going to manage a third week, though you never know.  Judging from the video, the quality of aim among American gun-users has improved little since the days of the A-Team.  Also, it’s remarkably easy to just run out of a bank besieged by the cops.

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I’m two weeks behind on this, so let’s race through the current week’s charts (albeit late) before it turns into three when tomorrow’s chart comes out.  Fortunately, they’ve been pretty quiet weeks.

The previous week’s number 1 was (as expected) “Payphone” by Maroon 5 featuring Wiz Khalifa, evidently not suffering too badly from the sales of spoiler cover versions.  Perhaps it even benefitted.  I still think it’s a pretty uninspiring song, though Samuel Bayer’s video cheerfully ignores it entirely in favour of blowing things up.

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With the Jubilee receding from view, Gary Barlow’s “Sing” drops back to number 3.  No surprise there.  The album is still holding up remarkably well, with a third week at number 1, but it’s surely got to peter out sooner rather than later.

There are a couple of very unlikely new entries on this week’s chart, but first, one that’s entirely predictable…

1.  Cheryl – “Call My Name”

Yes, officially it’s now just “Cheryl”.  For the benefit of readers overseas, this is Cheryl Cole, who you may remember from when she wasn’t on X-Factor in the USA.  Cole is her married name, but her marriage to footballer Ashley Cole broke down some time ago.  (“How do you think I feel when you call my name?”  Well, if the tabloids are anything to go by, I’d guess at “relieved”.)  Her maiden name of Tweedy has evidently been deemed insufficiently glamorous for the demands of the celebutainment industry.

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It’s Jubilee time, everyone!  Actually, as I write this, the British media have already moved on to the Olympic torch.  But this week’s chart shows the fall-out of the big Jubilee concert outside Buckingham Palace, which got a lot of TV time, and was one of the major events booked for the weekend.  The other stand-out was a big flotilla of boats along the Thames, an event which forced the elderly monarch and her husband to stand in the freezing rain without shelter for some two hours.  And then the next day they made her watch JLS.  I suspect she’s had more enjoyable weekends.

But major TV broadcasts of pop music shift records to people who don’t normally pay much attention, and that’s what we see this week, in a chart which combines some Jubilee-related hits and resurgences, a couple of other unexpected appearances, and regular releases from people who evidently figured it was going to be a quiet week.

1.  Gary Barlow & The Commonwealth Band – “Sing”

Jumping from 11 to 1, this is the specially composed song by Gary Barlow and Andrew Lloyd-Webber featuring musicians from around the Commonwealth, though it mainly sounds like Gary Barlow and Andrew Lloyd-Webber.  Some listings have the Military Wives Choir down as featured artists, though the official chart website would apparently beg to differ.  If you count them, it’s their second number one following the Christmas single “Wherever You Are”.

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As predicted, fun. only managed a single week at the top – though coming after a lengthy climb, and with the single still hanging around the top 3 in the midweeks, they’ve still had an impressive run.  For a while, it looked as though the Eurovision winner was going to do it, but as is often the case, sales tailed off in the second half of the week as the contest receded into the dim and distant memory of 72 hours ago.  Instead…

1.  Rudimental (feat. John Newman) – “Feel The Love”

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