We won’t be long with this one.

1. Dave – “Starlight”

A third week for Dave in a very, very dull top ten – the top seven is completely static. By the way, his only other number 1, “Freaky Friday”, only had a week. So by that metric, this is comfortably his biggest hit.

Anyway, in search of new entries we have to trawl all the way down to…

31. Joel Corry, David Guetta & Bryson Tiller – “What Would You Do”

They’re not kidding about that strobe warning at the start of the video, by the way. Anyhow, this is very much what you expect from something credited to Joel Corry and David Guetta – it’s very polished, it’s very professional, you can hear their signature stuff in it. You don’t come to these guys for innovation.

It’s the second hit that Corry and Guetta have had together (after “Bed” got to number 3 last year). You suspect this is a long distance collaboration given that Guetta’s bits of the video have very, very obviously been filmed separately. Corry’s first five hits all made the top 10, but he broke the streak with his previous single “I Wish”. That only made it to number 17, but it still managed a very respectable 15 weeks in the top 40. He’s started low and climbed before, too.

Bryson Tiller has two previous top 40 hits in the UK, though in both cases he was collaborating with much bigger names. 2020’s “Outta Time” reached number 24, but it featured Drake. And back in 2017, he was on the number 1 hit “Wild Thoughts”… but that’s a DJ Khaled track with Rihanna on it.

39. Machine Gun Kelly & Bring Me The Horizon – “Maybe”

And this is the only other new entry this week. Machine Gun Kelly’s biggest UK hit, rather oddly, was 2018’s “Rap Devil”, which got to number 15; since then he’s tacked to rock. He’s scraped a couple of minor hit singles in that mode, but his last album got to number 3, so fair enough. It’s not a genre that shows up that often in the top 40. Bring Me The Horizon are a rare example of a band who can do it, with three singles from their previous album making the top 40 at least for a week.

This week’s climbers:

• “Go” by Cat Burns clilmbs 10-8.
• “BMW” by the Bad Boy Chiller Crew climbs 21-9, giving them a proper, mainstream top ten hit single. I would not have seen that coming.
• “Anyone for You” by George Ezra climbs 14-12.
• “The Motto” by Tiesto & Ava Max climbs 15-13. It’s been in the top 40 for 11 weeks now, and it’s still climbing steadily.
• “Bam Bam” by Camila Cabello featuring Ed Sheeran climbs 18-16.
• “Glad U Came” by Liilz featuring ZieZie climbs 35-17, which is pretty huge. Sampling the Wanted works.
• “She’s All I Wanna Be” by Tate McRae climbs 27-21. This entered at number 24 back in February and it’s been hovering between 24 and 29 ever since. Is it finally making headway or is it just a quiet week?
• “Beg for You” by Charli XCX featuring Rina Sawayama climbs 38-24, beating its first-week peak of number 29 from February. It’s climbing because the album came out, but we’ll come back to that.
• “Run” by Becky Hill featuring Galantis climbs 28-25.
• “Used To This” by Wilkinson & Issey Cross climbs 40-33; it’s been on the top 40 for four weeks now, with a previous peak of 37 three weeks ago.

There are two new entries and two re-entries on the top 40 (both old tracks hovering around the 40 mark). The records on their way out are:

• “Sweetest Pie” by Megan Thee Stallion & Dua Lipa, which only managed a week at number 31. Considering it’s such a quiet week, that’s going to be disappointing.
• “Fingers Crossed” by Lauren Spencer-Smith, which must have hit the downweighting rule, since it suddenly plunged from 17.
• “Knock Knock” by Tion Wayne & M24, which managed three weeks in the top 40, peaking at 21.
• “Packs and Potions” by Hazey, which again gets hit by the downweighting rule; it spent 10 weeks in the top 40, peaking at number 11.

On the album chart…

1. Charli XCX – “Crash”

Charli XCX has been around for a decade now; her fifth album is not just her first number 1, but the first time she’s made the top 10. There’s even a hit single, “Beg For You”, currently at number 24. Still… it’s number 24, and she remains an odd case of a pop act who hung around for years as a cult thing instead of fully crossing over. She did notch up several top ten hits in 2014-15, and technically she’s credited as a featured artist on Icona Pop’s 2013 number 1 “I Love It” (which she’s not exactly prominent on, but she did write it).

2. ArrDee – “Pier Pressure”

Billed as his debut mixtape, but it’s got pretty much all his hit singles on it going back to last summer.

3. Sea Girls – “Homesick”

London indie. It’s their second album, with exactly the same position as the first. Can’t say the single does much for me.

5. Feeder – “Torpedo”

Just one place below their previous album, from 2022. We’re coming up for the 25th anniversary of their debut album “Polythene”. This is their eleventh.

7. Sam Tompkins – “Who Do You Pray To”

Another singer songwriter debut album. Weirdly, the only information about this guy on Wikipedia is that one of his Bruno Mars covers was once sampled on a drill record.

And that’s it, in an extremely quiet week.