[Looks at number of new entries this week.  Whimpers.  Cracks knuckles.]

1.  Calvin Harris & Sam Smith – “Promises”

Climbing to number 1 in its third week.  This is Calvin Harris’s tenth number one, the others being “Dance Wiv Me” (2008), “I’m Not Alone” (2009), “We Found Love” (2011), “Sweet Nothing” (2012), “Under Control” (2013), “Summer” (2014), “Blame” (2014), “Feels” (2017), and “One Kiss” (2018).  It’s hard to argue with that sort of track record – yes, two of them are “featuring” credits, but they’re very prominent ones – and clearly his change of direction a year or so back has paid dividends.  He joins a very, very small list of artists with ten or more number one hits – the others are Take That, Madonna, Cliff Richard, Westlife, the Beatles and Elvis Presley.  (He had 21, so there’s still a long way to go…)

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It’s the weeks like this that I enjoy.

1.  Benny Blanco featuring Halsey & Khalid – “Eastside”

New number one!  That’s not the most interesting thing about this week’s chart, but still, new number one!  “Eastside” has climbed 40-23-12-4-3-1 to get here, and it’s a great pop single (with a very good video), so I’m perfectly happy to see it here.  It might not be here long, though – it only has a very slight margin over the Calvin Harris & Sam Smith single, equivalent to 139 sales.

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It’s a busy week, so let’s dive in.

1.  George Ezra – “Shotgun”

Second week in this run, fourth week in total.  But it’s a busy week, so let’s move on…

2.  Calvin Harris & Sam Smith

The follow-up to “One Kiss” is along fairly similar lines – a while back, Calvin Harris made a fairly sharp stylistic turn away from his electropop formula and towards soul.  Now, he seems to have settled into a new formula.  Still, it’s a good formula, and this is one of his better renditions of it; and it suits Sam Smith’s voice, too.  It’s Sam Smith’s first appearance in the top 40 this year, and his first time in the top 10 since last year’s number one “Too Good at Goodbyes”.  This isn’t his primary genre, but he’s cropped up on Disclosure singles before.

8.  Ariana Grande – “Breathin”
22.  Ariana Grande – “Sweetener” (more…)

More of an albums chart week, this.  But let’s quickly knock through the singles chart first.  Believe me, this won’t take long.

1.  George Ezra – “Shotgun”

That’s a little unexpected.  “Shotgun” had two weeks at number one in July, but it’s been stuck at number two for five weeks behind first “Three Lions”, and then Drake.  Returning to number one is less rare than it used to be, though still unusual; returning to number one after five weeks is still pretty rare.

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This week: Travis Scott has an album out!  And…. um…

…yeah, that’s about it, to be honest.

1.  Drake – “In My Feelings”

Four weeks.  Its streaming points are still growing, but only very slightly; despite the release of the video during this chart week (which counts to the chart now, remember), it seems like this could be the peak.  The album is at 4; the other two singles are on their way out of the chart, currently sitting at 19 and 30.

9.  Travis Scott – “Sicko Mode”
15.  Travis Scott – “Stargazing”
29.  Travis Scott – “Carousel”

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Um… well, there’s some stuff happening lower down the album chart…

1.  Drake – “In My Feelings”

Three weeks – and look, it has a video now!  A video which is eight minutes long, more than twice the length of the song.  So you know it’s important.  The album “Scorpion” is still at 3, and the other two singles are at 13 and 28.  This heads up a static top three and a moribund top ten, except for…

4.  DJ Khaled featuring Justin Bieber, Quavo and Chance The Rapper – “No Brainer” (more…)

Look, we need dull weeks so that the slightly less dull weeks can seem interesting in comparison.

1.  Drake – “In My Feelings”

Two weeks, still no video.  The album “Scorpion” drops to 3 this week as it yields to a far, far greater force, but more of that later.  As for the other two Drake singles, “Don’t Matter To Me” drops to 7, and “Nonstop” falls to 22.  There could well be others that would qualify for the top 40 if it wasn’t for the three-song cap.

26.  Loud Luxury featuring Brando – “Body”

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You will not be surprised to hear that “Three Lions” is no longer number one.

1.  Drake – “In My Feelings”

Drake’s third number one of the year (after “Nice for What” and “God’s Plan”) and his fourth in total.  It’s broken from the album pack, presumably because it’s being used in viral dance videos – those don’t count towards the chart, even under the new rules, because only the official video counts.  Still, it’s giving the track a bit more attention.  The other two Drake tracks on this week’s chart are “Don’t Matter To Me” at 5, and “Nonstop” at 15.  “Scorpion” naturally gets a third week at number one on the album chart.

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Well, this is unfortunate timing.

1.  David Baddiel, Frank Skinner & The Lightning Seeds – “Three Lions”

England’s favourite football song soars to number one on the strength of the team’s sterling performance in the World Cup!  The semifinal, and peak of English excitement, was almost perfectly timed to coincide with the end of the chart week.  And… they lost.  So “Three Lions” arrives at number one just in time for the mood to be over.  Ah well.

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It’s the first chart with the new rules – video streams now count, paid streams are given a bit more weight, free streams are given a bit less.  Let’s see if we can spot the difference!  (Short answer: probably not.)

1.  George Ezra – “Shotgun”

Three weeks.  So no drastic change at the top.  Then again, perhaps we should have expected one, since look who’s got a new album out.

2.  Drake featuring Michael Jackson – “Don’t Matter To Me”
4.  Drake – “Nonstop”
5.  Drake – “Emotionless” (more…)