As we enter February, the release schedules are back to something approaching normal.  Of course, there’s always something odd going on.

40.  Dappy – “No Regrets”

This was the only solo number one for the N-Dubz bozo, back in 2011.  He was last in the chart in September 2012, and the only apparent reason for “No Regrets” to suddenly reappear now is his recent stint on Celebrity Big Brother, the once-mighty Channel 4 ratings titan now eking out a living in reduced circumstances on Channel 5.

34.  Sophie Ellis-Bextor – “Young Blood”

Sophie Ellis-Bextor has spent a decade plus making dance-pop.  After starting her career in indie band theaudience [sic] in the late 90s, she had a number 1 in 2000 as the guest singer on “Groovejet” by Spiller, and had a further six top ten hits in her own account in the early 2000s.  Now, she’s in her mid thirties, she hasn’t had a hit single since 2010, and it’s time to grow old gracefully.  Hence a successful run on Strictly Come Dancing, and now this track, which swings wildly in the other direction – a Radio 2-friendly ballad co-written by Ed Harcourt that seems sure to earn a place in the collection of any DJ who does a lot of wedding anniversaries.  It’s a very solid song – maybe a little two obviously craftsmanlike for its own good – and a pleasant change of pace here at the low end of the chart.

32.  Imagine Dragons – “Radioactive”

Making another of its periodic returns to the chart.  It peaked at number 12 in 2001.

21.  The Weather Girls – “It’s Raining Men”

As a rather literal-minded child, I remember being quite puzzled by this song when it came out.  Surely the men plummeting from the sky would be hurt?  Why were the women so pleased?

The Weather Girls are very close to being your classic one-hit wonder, a group known for a single song, which has somehow taken root in the national consciousness, albeit as a karaoke standard, gay anthem, and hen night soundtrack.  If you’re going with the UK Chart Company’s definition of a one-hit wonder, they don’t strictly qualify because they didn’t get to number 1 – “It’s Raining Men” only peaked at number 2 on its original release back in 1983.  But that’s a contentious definition.

Perhaps more to the point, Martha Wash later resurfaced as the uncredited singer on most of Black Box’s hits (though not “Ride On Time”, which was cobbled together from Loleatta Holloway samples).  That lack of credit – and her replacement in the videos with a lip-synching model – sparked litigation which set a precedent that resulted in the “featuring” credits that are now familiar.

“It’s Raining Men” is back in the chart because of an online campaign in response to David Silvester, a local councillor from the UK Independence Party, Britain’s answer to the Tea Party, who claimed that the reason for the recent flooding in the UK was God’s anger at the legalisation of gay marriage, and appeared to mean it literally.  This is a bizarre opinion even by UKIP’s notoriously crank-friendly standards, which probably contributed to this campaign tailing off over the course of the week, as everyone realised that Silvester was so crazily marginal even among his own party that there really wasn’t much point continuing to pay attention to him after you’d finished laughing at him.

23.  Chris Malinchak – “If U Got It”

The follow-up to “So Good To Me”, which made number 2 last May.  This track has been doing the round since 2012.  As with its predecessor, the vocals are a virtually unrecognisable set of samples – this time, they’re from “I’m Gonna Make You Love Me” by the Supremes and the Temptations, a number 3 hit from 1969.

19.  Katy Perry featuring Juicy J – “Dark Horse”

This is actually a re-entry – back in September, it was released to US radio as a “promotional single” (whatever that means) after winning a fan vote, and duly spent a week at 21 before vanishing entirely.  It’s now being re-promoted as a proper single (though it still doesn’t have a video), and she performed it at the Grammies.  It’s number 1 on the Billboard chart right now, but honestly, I wouldn’t trust the Billboard chart as far as I could throw it.

11.  Onerepublic – “If I Lose Myself”

Jumping 32-11 now that the Alesso mix in available.

5.  Katy B – “Crying For No Reason”

The closest Katy B has yet come to releasing a ballad, I think.  Even though it shifts back to something close to her regular arrangement about 90 seconds in, it’s still a ballad at heart.  It’s also her biggest hit since “Lights On” back in 2011.  And it’s holding up quite well on the iTunes chart, so she might be sticking around longer than usual.

3.  Gorgon City featuring MNEK – “Ready For Your Love”

Gorgon City are a production duo from London.  They’ve released several previous singles (including one with Clean Bandit, oddly enough), but this is their first appearance on the chart.  It’s alright, I guess, but it feels like a fairly routine house track to me.

MNEK is a 19-year-old singer songwriter who’s also getting his first chart credit.  He’s been floating around as a writer and producer for a few years, though; among other things, he co-wrote “Need U (100%)” by Duke Dumont, a number one hit last year.

2.  will.i.am featuring Miley Cyrus, French Montana & Wiz Khalifa – “Feelin’ Myself”

This week’s highest new entry is indeed a will.i.am single.  It’s terrible, of course.  The bassline ought to work, and there’s something eminently plausible about the idea of will.i.am gazing with tremendous satisfaction into the mirror, but it goes nowhere, and it’s just a string of guest stars who add nothing.  Miley Cyrus and Wiz Khalifa are familiar names (though was anyone really crying out to hear Miley rap?), while French Montana is a Moroccan born rapper who appears to be phoning it in.  The lyrics are, to be diplomatic, best ignored – isn’t will.i.am a bit off brand by telling us how he enjoys “banging hoes in the continental”?

Of mild interest, the radio edit dutifully removes loads of stuff but leaves in two references to “mollies”.

1.  Clean Bandit featuring Jess Glynne – “Rather Be”

A second week at number one, with sales now totalling 200,000 copies.  This is a massive hit, and it doesn’t look to be under any real pressure next week either.

On the albums chart, it’s alt-rock week!

• “Cavalier Youth” by You Me At Six at 1.  Their fourth album, their first number one.  The chart positions have been getting higher with every release, though.  The lead single “Lived a Lie” made number 11 back in September; the follow-ups didn’t chart.
• “Feels Like Home” by Sheryl Crow at 16.  A belated UK release for her ninth album, which came out in the US last autumn.  Her biggest UK hit was “All I Wanna Do”, which made the top 5 in 1994, but she hasn’t had a hit single in over a decade.  Lead single: “Easy”.
• “Restoring Force” by Of Mice & Men at 17.  A US rock band on their third album, who’ve never previously charted in the UK.  Lead single: “You’re Not Alone”.
• “None the Wiser” by the Rifles at 21.  An indie band from Chingford, apparently, now on their fourth album.  This is weird – I don’t recognise their name at all, yet they’ve been around since 2006 and they’ve had three top 40 singles.  Can’t have made much impact on me.  Single: “Minute Mile”.
• “Kill the Power” by Skindred at 28.  More rock, this time with a bit of raga chucked in.  This is their fifth album, and their first to chart.  Title track.
• “In the Silence” by Ásgeir at 40.  Ásgeir Trausti is an Icelandic songwriter; this is his first English-language release, consisting of translations of his Icelandic songs.  He’s had two number ones in Iceland.  From this album, his song “King and Cross” got to number 13 in Japan.