It looks as if we’re deeply embedded in one of the slowest chart eras for years.  The main reason for that, of course, is that the charts are increasingly determined by streaming data rather than sales.  And while sales measure how many people were interested enough to buy a track in the first place, streaming data is more interested in how long they keep listening to it.

In many ways this is a good thing for the chart, because it puts an end to the days when you could engineer a number one by releasing your single in a quiet week and relying on fan base sales.  In that sense, a chart position is arguably more meaningful than it’s been in quite some ways.  But in other ways, it’s a problem, because there simply isn’t very much happening, which doesn’t greatly serve the chart’s other role of promotion.

So when we left off at the end of February, “7 Years” by Lukas Graham had been at number for three weeks.  It went on to stay there for another two, so evidently this rather maudlin reflection on ageing has more appeal than I can comprehend.   Perhaps it’s the video.  Maybe it reminds people of Wayne’s World.

After that, for the remaining two weeks of March, we have another song I already covered last month: “I Took A Pill In Ibiza” by Mike Posner.  This just barely inched it to number 1 last week (with streaming data factored in, it beat Lukas Graham by the equivalent of 261 copies), but stretched out today.  I used the original last time, but the Seeb remix is the one that’s actually being pushed in the UK, and it’s got a video now.

While that video’s obviously playing the “alone in a crowd” card a bit, it’s also pretty much a video for the title and the chorus, even though most of the song is actually Posner lamenting the emptiness of his quasi-fame as a music industry guy hitherto best known for a single track back in 2010.  In the original, the opening lines about Avicii are ironically out of place; as a dance mix, it becomes something of an exercise in assuming that people probably aren’t paying too much attention to the lyrics.

What about the month’s other new entries?  The highest new entry on 4 March was “Rinse & Repeat” by Riton featuring Kah-Lo at number 13, which crashed from there, though it’s still clinging in at 37.  I like the video a lot, though.  Riton is a DJ who’s been releasing records sporadically since 2000, making his first chart appearance.  Pretty much all I know about Kah-Lo is that she’s Nigerian, I’m afraid.  There’s a promotional website for this single, but it’s broken.  Maybe it’ll work when you try the link?  Who knows.

Also entering the chart that week: “Girls Like” by Tinie Tempah featuring Zara Larsson at 15, since climbing to 9.  Larsson’s own single “Lush Life” has been in the top 5 all month, so a bit of a breakthrough period for her.  That’s not her in the video, though, which suggests this track wasn’t originally intended as a promotional vehicle for her.  “Work From Home” by Fifth Harmony featuring Ty Dolla Sign entered at 23 and has now climbed to 3, equally their previous peak with “Worth It”.  The video could not be accused of subtlety, and poor Ty looks a bit out of place.    And at 40 (since climbing to 20), there’s “Hands to Myself” by Selena Gomez, which is pretty much what you’re expecting.

The 11 March chart is pretty much dormant – there were a couple of high climbers, but the only new entry was “The Right Song” by Tiesto & Oliver Heldens featuring Natalie La Rose all the way down at 39, which was gone again almost immediately.  It’s a bog standard EDM track.

18 March is a bit more active, though the highest new entry is still down at 17 (and dropped this week).  It’s “Dangerous Woman” by Ariana Grande, whose UK chart record remains patchy – technically she has two number 1 singles to her name but both had higher profile guest stars attached.  In an odd call, there’s no official video for this on YouTube, but there is this, um, acapella thing.  The full audio version is here, but the acapella is probably more interesting.

Two other entries that week.  “Cake by the Ocean” by DNCE entered at 26 and climbed to 21 today.  This is the debut single from Joe Jonas’s post-Disney project, and it features swearing, women in bikinis, and, god help us, Josh Ostrovsky.   And “Like I Would” by Zayn Malik – sorry, ZAYN – at 30 was a teaser track for his album.

Finally, this week.  Our highest new entry is “Say You Do” by Sigala featuring Imani & DJ Fresh at number 5, which seems to be an attempt to cross drum and bass with tropical house, the result being a drum and bass track with steel drums.  Which is actually quite a good thing.  It’s Sigala’s third top 10 hit, so last year’s sample-heavy number 1 “Easy Love” was evidently not a fluke – in fact, it was number 1 in the midweeks (so sales must have been frontloaded, and it’s likely to fall).  This one is also keen on the samples, though less obviously so – despite a live singer in Imani, part of the vocal hook is borrowed from Mariah Carey’s “Always Be My Baby”.

Further down, “Nothing Like This” by Blonde & Craig David enters at 17, so his recent comeback hit wasn’t a fluke either.  And at number 33, “Roses” by Chainsmokers featuring Rozes, a belated follow-up to their novelty hit “Selfie” from 2014, which is a rather less gimmicky affair.

And that’s it, for another remarkably quiet month.  Surely it has to pick up a bit from here…?