It’s the Christmas number one, and at long last…

1. Wham! – “Last Christmas”

That’s three weeks, and six in total, if you count 2020 and 2022. But this is the first time that it’s actually been the Christmas number one – on its first release it ran into Band Aid, and over the last few years, the Christmas number one has been monopolised by Ladbaby’s charity singles. He didn’t release one this year, and nothing else emerged to fill the gap either, leaving us with a battle between Wham representing the back catalogue, and Sam Ryder’s “You’re Christmas To Me”, which climbs 10-2 this week – matching the peak of his Eurovision song “Space Man” last year.

The Christmas tracks still dominate the chart – there are 33 of them this week – but things may start freeing up next week, since Christmas Day falls four days into the streaming week. Then again, maybe people will absolutely hammer the Christmas tracks in the first half of the week. We’ll see.

20. Cher – “DJ Play a Christmas Song”

Climbing from last week’s number 41, and probably helped by her doing it on the final of Strictly Come Dancing. Cher hasn’t had a hit single since “I Hope You Find It” reached number 25 in 2013, though in fairness, it’s not like she’s released much.

This does at least set a few records. She’s now had a hit single in every decade since the 1960s, and at age 77, she’s comfortably the oldest woman to have had a hit single. Technically the record for the oldest man is held by 99-year old Tom Moore – he mumbles a few lines on a version of “You’ll Never Walk Alone”, mostly sung by Michael Ball, which reached number 1 in 2020. But he got a credit for it, so apparently it counts.

29. Creator Universe – “I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday”

This is a charity single by assorted social media types, doing the safe thing of covering Wizzard. It doesn’t have the momentum to come anywhere close to Ladbaby territory. The obvious problem here is that it’s a completely straight cover of the Wizzard original (number 26 this week) which just isn’t as good, so there’s no obvious reason why you’d actually listen it to unless you were a fan of one of the contributors. Ladbaby figured out that he had to put some sort of comedy value into the record itself, though he was still wise to quit while he was ahead. And he at least seemed organic – Creator Universe sounds like a provincial web design agency.

31. Laufey – “Winter Wonderland”

A first top 40 hit for the Icelandic jazz singer. This is a Spotify exclusive, so it’ll benefit from being included in their Christmas playlists. It’s a perfectly respectable trad version of the song.

35. Darlene Love – “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)”

This is one of the lower-tier Christmas regulars. It reached number 22 in 2018, 33 in 2019, and missed the top 40 altogether in 2020. Then for some reason it picked up again, reaching 32 in 2021 and 29 in 2022.

As a track from the Phil Spector Christmas Album, it wasn’t released as a single when recorded. Love’s only other solo hit was the 1992 track “All Alone on Christmas” from Home Alone 2, which got to number 31 and remains stubbornly unloved in the streaming era.

36. Nat King Cole – “The Christmas Song”

This charted for the first time last year, when it got to 35.

This week’s climbers are many in number but small in movement, since the chart is already jammed with tinsel.

• “You’re Christmas to Me” by Sam Ryder climbs 10-2, as already mentioned.
• “Merry Christmas” by Ed Sheeran & Elton John climbs 6-5.
• “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” by Andy Williams climbs 14-12.
• “Underneath the Tree” by Kelly Clarkson climbs 15-13.
• “Do They Know It’s Christmas” by Band Aid climbs 17-15.
• “Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!” by Dean Martin climbs 18-16, which is an all-time peak.
• “Stay Another Day” by Jorja Smith climbs 20-18.
• “Driving Home for Christmas” by Chris Rea climbs 22-21. It got to 10 two years ago and 16 last year, so it does seem to be tailing off.
• “Sleigh Ride” by the Ronettes climbs 24-22.
• “I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday” by Wizzard climbs 27-26. This track hasn’t missed the top 20 since 2016.
• “Feliz Navidad” by José Feliciano climbs 32-28.
• “One More Sleep” by Leona Lewis climbs 34-32. Another one to look out for – this hasn’t missed the top 30 since 2016.
• “Mistletoe” by Justin Bieber climbs 36-34.

These are the five tracks leaving the top 40 to make way for more Christmas, but bear in mind they’ll almost certainly be back after Christmas.

• “Can’t Catch Me Now” by Olivia Rodrigo, which peaked at 12 and lasted six weeks.
• “Exes” by Tate McRae, peaking at 12 and lasting four weeks.
• “Stop Giving Me Advice” by Dave & Jack Harlow, after a single week at 29.
• “Water” by Tyla, peaking at 4 and lasting 14 weeks.
• “My Love Mine All Mine” by Mitski, peaking at 8 and lasting 13 weeks.

If you ignored all the Christmas records, the top 10 would look like this:

1 (1) Noah Kahan – “Stick Season” (number 4)
2 (2) Jack Harlow – “Lovin On Me” (number 8)
3 (3) Tate McRae – “Greedy” (number 17)
4 (7) Dua Lipa – “Houdini” (number 37)
5 (8) Taylor Swift – “Is It Over Now (Taylor’s Version)” (number 38)
6 (6) Fred again.. & Baby Keem – “Leavemealone” (number 39)
7 (RE) Billy Gillies featuring Hannah Boleyn – “DNA (Loving You)” (number 40)
8 (9) Olivia Rodrigo – “Can’t Catch Me Now” (number 42)
9 (RE) cässo x Raye x D-Block Europe – “Prada” (number 43)
10 (RE) Tate McRae – “Exes” (number 44)

With “Water” out, the longest running track in the top 40 is Tate McRae’s “Greedy”, at 14 weeks.

On the album chart, there are no new entries at all. “Hackney Diamonds” by the Rolling Stones returns to number 1, presumably as a last minute present for elderly dads.