Dead week, pretty much.  And judging from iTunes, next week’s going to be pretty dead too.  So brace yourself for a long run at the top for Avicii…

32.  Lana Del Rey – “Summertime Sadness”

Lana Del Rey likes number 32.  This is her sixth top 40 hit, and three of them wound up at number 32.  Any numerologists out there should feel free to offer interpretations in the comments.

“Summertime Sadness” is a track from her album “Born To Die” which was released as a single as long ago as June 2012, but hasn’t previously charted in the UK.  It’s probably charting now because her record company have been re-promoting it with some remixes, but the current chart rules don’t generally distinguish between different versions of the same song as long as they’re still credited to the same artist.  Here’s the Cedric Gervais mix, which preserves a surprising amount of the verses but feels a bit inappropriately joyful the rest of the time.

As always with Lana Del Rey, this teeters on the verge of self-parody.  (“Summertime Sadness”?)  You can decide for yourself how much of that is self-aware; I think, more than she’s often credited for.  The video is a rather nice edit of mock-found footage of Del Rey, which she’s done before, but I think works well for her persona.

27.  Toploader – “Dancing in the Moonlight”

Ah, this again.  “Dancing in the Moonlight” was Toploader’s biggest hit, reaching number 7 in 2000.  This is apparently old enough to have the Radio 1 chart show treat it as a beloved old classic.  It’s a cover; the original was released in 1972 by American ex-pats King Harvest, which reached number 13 in America but didn’t chart in the UK.

Toploader actually had four other top 40 hits, but good luck finding anyone outside their immediate family who can name one.  This is in the chart because (a) it’s in the iTunes 59p sale, and (b) it’s an incredibly quiet week.

14.  Calvin Harris featuring Ayah Marar – “Thinking About You” 

Climbing 14 places, so it could yet maintain Harris’ streak of top ten hits.

2.  One Direction – “Best Song Ever”

No it isn’t.

This is a weird video, since the stock Hollywood gags have literally nothing whatsoever to do with the song that follows.  Mind you, the two band members playing the Hollywood producers are actually quite good.  No surprise they get almost all the lines.

The conceit of the actual song is that they went out, they met a girl – in the best boy band tradition, they appear to have embarked on this enterprise collectively – and they danced to the best song ever, but they can’t remember how it goes, so they’re just recounting the experience.  And yes, that is also the conceit of “Tribute” by Tenacious D.  But One Direction’s fanbase probably weren’t even in nursery when “Tribute” came out twelve years ago, so what the heck.

What’s any of that got to do with Hollywood?  Nothing, but that’s not going to stop One Direction promoting their upcoming film One Direction: This Is Us, a behind-the-scenes documentary shot in 3D by Morgan Spurlock, who I can only assume has some pressing fundraising requirements for his next project.

Normally this would have been expected to give One Direction an easy fifth number one, but it’s up against a monster.

1.  Avicii – “Wake Me Up!”

Still there for a second week.  It has a proper video now – and what a misjudged slab of self-proclaimed victimhood it is too…

As I mentioned last week, this track inexplicably doesn’t credit singer Aloe Blacc.  That’s all the stranger given that we’re in the era of the Featured Artist.  Of this year’s sixteen number ones so far, eleven have had featured artist credits, and this should have been the twelfth.  The other four, if you’re wondering, went to One Direction, Justin Timberlake, PJ & Duncan, and John Newman.

Over on the album chart:

• “Love Never Fails” by Jahmene Douglas at number 1.  This guy was a losing finalist in the 2012 series of X Factor, and he’s bypassed singles entirely, going straight to MOR albums.    There’s a video for his cover of “Titanium”, but it seems to have been put out purely for promotional purposes without actually being made available as a single.  The track could be politely described as very X Factor, and accurately described as absolutely appalling.
  
• “Stars Dance” by Selena Gomez at number 14, following on her recent hit single.  Her first solo album to chart, following three Selena Gomez & The Scene albums that all just missed the top 10.
• “Hyde Park Live” by the Rolling Stones at 16.  An iTunes exclusive rush-release drawn from two shows they played earlier this month.
• “Slow Focus” by F*** Buttons at 36.  (We’re an all-ages podcast, I may as well stick to that here.)  They’re from Bristol, and this is their first hit album.  Here’s the single “Red Wing”.
• “Hey! Hello!” by Hey! Hello! at number 37.  This was number 12 in the midweeks, so its sales must have been really frontloaded.  Hey! Hello! is a collaboration between  Ginger from the Wildhearts and American singer Victoria Liedtke.  Here’s the single “How I Survived The Punk Wars” (which is exactly what the title suggests, and pretty good, in fact).