This won’t take long – it’s another dead week on the chart.

LMFAO’s “Party Rock Anthem” is number 1 for the fourth week, but it’s dodged a bullet.  The highest new entry, at number 3, is “Where Them Girls At” by David Guetta featuring Flo Rida and Nicki Minaj.  It could very easily have been number 1, but there was a screw-up with iTunes that cost it a couple of days sales there.

This is a rush-release after a bootleg remix of the song was leaked, so there isn’t a video yet.  Supposedly somebody obtained the vocal track illegally and put out a dodgy version with a rubbish backing track that Guetta wanted to distance himself from.  Whether this is true or not, the record company has certainly used it as the promotional hook for the track.  There doesn’t seem to be an audio version on YouTube (of decent quality), but let’s be honest, it sounds like a lot of other recent David Guetta records, so you’re not missing much.  Here’s the official trailer from Guetta’s YouTube channel, which gives you the general idea.

Well, wasn’t that thrilling?

It’s Guetta’s 12th UK hit (not counting pure production jobs where he didn’t get a credit), and gives him two singles in the current top ten – the other being his remix of the Snoop Dogg single we’re apparently calling “Sweat”.  Flo Rida gets his tenth hit, and it’s the fifth and biggest hit for serial collaborator Nicki Minaj, in a chart career that only started last October.  Her previous peak was number 9, for Jay Sean’s “2012”.

And… yes, that’s basically all there is to say about “Where Them Girls At” by David Guetta.  We await the video with bated breath.

In a dead week, there are only three other new entries.  Number 16 is “I Can” by Blue, which is this year’s UK entry for the Eurovision Song Contest.  Blue were a second-tier boy band from a decade ago, who had a respectable run in the early part of the century.  They had 11 hits between 2001 and 2004, including three number 1s (“Too Close”, “If You Come Back” and a cover of “Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word” – though I suspect their best-remembered song is “All Rise”).  They reformed in the wake of Take That’s successful comeback.  After years of dismal embarrassment at Eurovision, the BBC has ditched the public vote to decide on the UK entry and simply presented Blue as a fait accompli.  To be honest, this isn’t a bad decision, since it’s the best song we’ve entered in years (not that that’s saying much).  And Blue are at least seasoned troopers who can be trusted not to screw things up.

It won’t win (my money’s on Sweden), but it does deserve to get a respectable upper-table placing and come out with some dignity.

Continuing the European theme, number 31 is a Romanian single, though it’s not their Eurovision entry.  (That would be 80s throwback “Change” by Hotel FM.)  No, this is “Mr Saxobeat” by Alexandra Stan.

With a title like “Mr Saxobeat”, you know you’re looking at Eurodance.  Says Wikipedia, “Lyrically, the song is about Stan trying to attract a man she is in love with.  She speaks of him making her dance and ‘move like a freak’.”  Thanks, Wikipedia.

This was in fact a huge hit in Romania, where it spent eight weeks at number 1.  It’s done pretty well internationally, making the top ten across Europe, and number 1 in Denmark and Italy.  In the byzantine, sub-genred world of the American Billboard charts, it apparently topped something called the “Hot Dance Airplay” chart, and inexplicably reached number 15 on the Latin Pop Songs chart, which evidently takes a broad stance on its remit.  It looks like it’s going further in the UK as well.

As near as I can figure from her wildly contradictory Wikipedia entries, this is her first international single.  International markets were apparently not thought to be ready for her 2009 Romanian debut “Lollipop (Param Pam Pam).”  See if you can work out why.  It’s a classy little number.

(In the interests of fairness: she’s a better singer than either of these videos might suggest.  YouTube also has her surprisingly respectable cover version of “Take A Bow”, which suggests her producers could be getting more from her.)

The only other new entry this week is “I’m Into You” by Jennifer Lopez featuring Lil Wayne at number 40.  That’s an anticipated future single from her new album (as in, it’s already been a single in other territories); the lead single “On the Floor” is still at number 5.

No new entries means loads of climbers.  Jessie J climbs to 9 with “Nobody’s Perfect”; Aloe Blacc’s “I Need a Dollar” is up to 10; “Give Me Everything” by Pitbull to 12; the achingly slow climb of Birdy’s “Skinny Love” reaches 17; “Time” by Chase & Status climbs 17 places to 21; and “Dirty Talk” by Wynter Gordon reaches 25.