In which Taylor Swift releases the special edition of her last album and everyone else stays out of her way.

1. Taylor Swift – “Patient Zero”
3. Taylor Swift – “Cleveland”
4. Taylor Swift – “Babylon”

These are from the special edition of “The Life of a Showgirl”, which duly returns to number 1 for a fifth week. There are four new tracks on the album, but the three song limit excludes “Pink Clouding”. “Patient Zero” is the official single. It’s decent enough for a midtempo Taylor Swift track that didn’t make the main album, though I could live without that bridge section.

“Cleveland” is the home town of Travis Kelce, and it’s as cutesy as that might suggest. The lyric video makes it look like an 80s sitcom theme. “Babylon” is Swift at her most Ed Sheeran. The midweek chart suggests that these two aren’t going to stick around, but that “Patient Zero” is on course for a second week.

If nothing else, “Patient Zero” is a number 1 that actually did beat “Rein Me In” outright, even before allowing for ACR downweighting.

22. Madonna – “Danceteria”

This previously managed a week at number 38 in July. It’s back because of the remix above, featuring Charli XCX, although officially the original is still the lead version, so she doesn’t get a chart credit for it. Judging from the midweeks, it’ll be gone next week.

36. DJ Goja, Jason Derulo & Melody – “Mi Chico”

This track has been floating around the lower reaches since July but hasn’t previously got above number 76, so I’m not sure what’s suddenly prompted it to leap into the top 40 now. DJ Goja is a Romanian producer who has sole credit on the original version, released about six months ago. The original has a fairly obviously AI-generated video and I’d assume that the uncredited original vocal is also AI-generated. Either way, the international release is essentially the same record with new vocals by Jason Derulo and the Brazilian singer Melody.

This week’s climbers:

• “Babydoll” by Jamie Miller climbs 8-6.
• “Don’t Look Back in Anger” by Oasis climbs 31-29.

Yes, that’s it. And the five tracks leaving the top 40:

• “Jamaican (Bam Bam)” by Hugel & Solto, which re-entered at 37 last week.
• “Hate That I Made You Love Me” by Ariana Grande, a one-week number 1 that lasted 17 weeks.
• “Be Her” by Ella Langley, after a seven week run peaking at number 28. She still has “Choosin’ Texas” at number 5.
• “9 to 5” and “Jolene” by Dolly Parton, after a five week run that peaked at numbers 5 and 6.

On the album chart, “The Life of a Showgirl” by Taylor Swift is number 1.

2. Keo – “Put a Smile On For Me”

I suppose grunge revivalists were bound to show up at some point. It’s their debut album and they’re from London.

3. Nothing But Thieves – “Stray Dogs”

It’s their fifth album, all of which have made the top 10. The last one was a number 1, but then they didn’t release it against Taylor Swift. (They did release it against Olivia Dean, but that was before her commercial breakthrough.)

26. Soft Cell – “Danceteria”

I was going to say there’s no connection to the Madonna single of the same name, but there is – they’re both named after the same New York nightclub. It’s their sixth studio album; the last one, in 2022, made the top 10, so this is on the low side. It was recorded shortly before Dave Ball’s death last year. Honestly, I think I prefer their “Danceteria” title track to Madonna’s.

30. Europe – “Come This Madness”

This is their twelfth studio album, after a nine year gap. Only two of their previous albums made the top 40 in the UK – “The Final Countdown” reached number 9 in 1986, and its follow-up “Out of This World” got to number 12 in 1988.

35. Tinashe – “Popstar”

“No Broke Boys” may have hung around the singles chart for months, but it was a remix of a track from her previous album, and it hasn’t done anything for the singles for this album. That’s a shame, because the track above is really rather good. On the bright side, she does at least get her first top 40 album in the UK, at the eighth attempt.